Read Pam’s How to avoid being "fan boy" or "fan girl" advice

I was with my wife and son walking around the lower east side of Manhattan, where he lived, when we ran into an Oscar-winning movie star (no names in this one) having tea at some five-table place. My son said it was owned by Moby, and I still don’t know who that is, but it was smaller than your living room.

My wife wanted the autograph, my son and I shied at the thought of being so obtrusive. So we hung in the background while she went up, struck up a conversation, and she and that unnamed movie star congratulated each other on its being Mother’s Day. Which it was. And my wife had a much better time for those ten minutes than either of us dimwits (sorry Paul) in the background.

That’s almost off topic except that looking back on that little incident, my wife was better off and so was the movie star whose tea she interrupted, or at least I think so, they both seemed to have a very pleasant exchange. Hanging back, I’d guess, isn’t always the best option.

Moving to something more related to business and blogging (but you’ll see the connection) I remembered this chance meeting as I thoroughly enjoyed Pamela Slim’s post yesterday on Escape from Cubicle Nation, funny at parts — I clicked the link to her “possessed madwoman” photos — but also really getting at something that (I suspect) a lot of us occasionally run up against. Who wants to be that one who Pam calls “fan boy?” From the beginning:

Whomever you note on your “cool smart I wanna be like them when I grow up” list, you can and should look for ways to build relationships with them.

But, as creatures still stinging from the social dynamics of junior high, we can fall into “fan boy or fan girl traps” which not only make us feel insecure, but turn off the very people we are trying to impress.

So here are my tips, learned from the school of hard knocks:

So here’s the link to the rest of it: Escape from Cubicle Nation: How to avoid being “fan boy” or “fan girl” when building relationships with people you admire


  • Francesca says:

    Thanks for linking another great blog, I've now added it to my reader. All very good tips when trying to approach famous/influential/people you admire.
    Another tip might be to not waste their time with meaningless prattle or empty emails.
    Have you checked out Tim Ferriss' blog, Four Hour Work Week? He tackles the same issue in some insightful posts.

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